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Posts Tagged ‘maid of honor duties’

Each member of the bridal party has his or her own specific duties. If you’re the bride, you’ll want to let each person know what you’ll need them to do. If you’re in the bridal party, you’ll want to find out what might be expected of you so there are no embarrassing omissions. Traditions have dictated over the years what each role means, but today’s brides and grooms are customizing everything, so be sure to check where you’re needed.

Maid of Honor

This lady is the first mate to the captain, the bride. She’s in charge of making sure the bride has everything she needs to get ready on the morning of the wedding including her makeup and hair products, her dress and accessories. She’s also traditionally the one to throw the bridal shower and offer up the bachelorette party supplies. There are expenses that you’ll incur as the chief bridesmaid. If you can’t afford to pay for the parties as well as your dress and shoes, think about either declining to be the Maid of Honor or asking someone to share expenses for the parties with you. Often, the other bridesmaids will step in.

Best Man

The Best Man typically throws the bachelor party. On the big day, he is in charge of getting the groom to the church on time. He’s the one who drives the groom to the ceremony. He will usher family members to their seats and walk the Maid of Honor down the aisle and escort her out after the ceremony. He’s also in charge of holding the wedding rings until they are presented during the ceremony. Often, he will sign as a witness on the marriage certificate. He’s also on the front lines scouting for any problems that may creep up the day of the wedding. He may be asked to hand out checks to vendors who have to be paid such as the restaurant, pianist, etc.

Groomsmen

The groomsmen are there to stand up for the groom and offer him moral support. They help usher family and friends to their seats at the ceremony. They are also the escort for a bridesmaid and are partnered with her for the first dance at the reception. There is some expense involved in being a groomsman. You’ll need to rent a tuxedo and shoes. You’ll also need to travel to the site and be part of the rehearsal the night before. If you can't afford the hotel or clothing expenses, think about declining the offer.

Bridesmaids

After the Maid of Honor, you’re the ones who’ve got the bride’s back. Is she missing anything? Does she need anything to eat or drink? Does she want help with her veil? You’re also there to walk down the aisle in a procession before her. You’ll need to pay for a dress and shoes plus any jewelry the bride would like you to wear. It’s suggested you help pay for the bridal shower and bachelorette party as well. At the wedding, you dance with the groomsman you’ve been paired up with and mingle so the bride sees everyone mixing and having a good time.

Flower Girl

Often a niece of the bride or groom, this little girl dresses in a mini version of the bride’s gown and is the first to walk down the aisle. She throws rose petals from a decorated basket and stands with the bridesmaids. If she is very young, she may go back to her seat with her parents. Her role after that is just to be adorable.

Ring Bearer

This is the little guy who brings the rings down the aisle, typically with or behind the flower girl. He carries them on a pillow with strings attached to hold the rings. Often he’s given plastic rings and the Best Man holds onto the actual rings. Once he makes his entrance, he usually sits down with his parents. Then, he gets to show off his dance moves at the reception.

Don't forget the bridal party gifts. Find some fun ideas on Wedding Party Gifts.

You may be wondering what the rules are for the hosting of a bridal shower. The answer is, there are no rules anymore. Anyone can host a shower these days, but here are some guidelines to think about.

Best Friends

If you are the bride’s best friend and/or maid of honor, you might feel like you should offer to throw her bridal shower. If this is within your means, it is certainly one of the expected jobs of the head bridesmaid. First, though, you’ll want to check with both the mother of the groom and the mother of the bride to see what they had in mind. Although tradition dictates it’s the maid of honor’s call and she should host (and pay for) the shower, moms may assume they are naturally involved in the planning and cost-sharing. However, with so many nontraditional families these days and family members living farther away from each other, there are no hard and fast rules. Just be sure to check what the others are doing before you plan anything. If you get the green light, have a ball! If your means will only allow you to have a small number of close friends, offer to throw a friends night out shower at a local restaurant. Alternately you can ask the other members of the bridal party to chip in on unique bridal shower favors or food so you can include everyone that you’d like to. And if you’re financially unable to shoulder the cost of the party, be honest with others. They may offer to step in and cover the whole cost.

Mother of the Bride

Traditionally the mother of the bride does not offer to throw a shower. The idea being that it would look as though she were asking for gifts for her daughter, and that would be in poor taste. But often, she will be the only one available, or her home is the only place available to host it and that’s okay too. But where possible, a friend or someone from the bridal party should step up and offer to at least co-host and thereby split the cost. The bridal shower invitations should come from someone other than the mom. Traditional wording might say, “You’re invited to Laura’s bridal shower compliments of Suzie, her maid of honor, and held at Brenda, her mom’s house.” The mother of the groom is also exempt from having to throw the shower, although chances are she’ll want a front row seat in the planning. Depending on if there are step-moms in the picture, be sure to check in with everyone so feelings aren’t hurt.

Co-Workers

Here’s where it gets a little tricky. Are co-workers of the bride expected to throw a separate shower? Yes and no. Co-workers are not required by any means to host an expensive off-site shower with the bride’s family and friends. That’s the job of the maid of honor. But, if you and a group of co-workers are very close to the bride, you might offer to throw a small bridal shower during lunch hour in the company break room. You can include everyone from your department (or those at work who are close to her). Simply purchase a sheet cake or make cookies or muffins and decorate with streamers and balloons. This will, of course, depend on the workplace atmosphere and protocol. Do as much or as little as you like. And if you feel your workplace is not the best atmosphere to host a small fete for the bride, offer to take her out for drinks or dinner with the people she’s close to at work and you can give her your gifts there. Sometimes, depending on how close you are to the bride, you will also be invited to the family’s shower. If so, you may want to keep it under your hat, as surely some folks from work will not be invited and you want to avoid hurt feelings.

More on Bridal Showers:

• How Many Bridal Showers Should a Bride Have
• Free Bridal Shower Game Ideas
• Most Popular Wedding Registries
• Wedding & Bridal Shower Theme Ideas
• Unique Bridal Shower Favor Ideas
• Fun Bridal Shower Themes